A Friend of a Friend’s Sister in Law’s Mom
The other day a friend of a friend’s sister in law’s mom (From here I’ll refer to her as Suzy Stranger) posted on Facebook about how throughout her whole marriage her husband has never let her do the dishes by herself if he was at home. Wow, what a really wonderful and sweet thing for Suzy Stranger’s husband to do. The problem is that, as soon as I read that statement I wanted to tag my husband so that…well, you can guess why.
Ughh. I hate that I wanted to do that.
I hate that I wanted to compare my marriage to someone else’s.
Suzy has every right to brag about her husband on Facebook: especially if she isn’t one of those over-bragger types. I bet it made his day to see that post.
Instead of reading about what her husband does better than mine, I wish I could have just read it as what her husband does that is DIFFERENT than mine. I could tell you hundreds of things that my husband is good at. I guarantee you he makes me laugh more than Suzy laughs at her husband.
BUT WAIT, who cares? It doesn’t matter.
“Comparison is the thief of joy.” -Theodore Roosevelt
It’s crazy how many married people have given Tripp and I marital advice in just 5 months of being married. Most of it is great… but when someone starts telling us how they do things because they think we should be like them, I immediately tune out. Give me your story and explain your ways but don’t disregard how uniquely different we are. I have seen how Tripp does dishes* and I don’t really want him doing ours.
How can we be better at not comparing but celebrating differences?
How can we share and celebrate our own stories without projecting them onto other people?
*He doesn’t understand cleaning dishes before you put them in the dishwasher